I've been smoking alot. My mind hurts. This last week has been hard. My body is shutting down and I can feel it. I like to feel myself die, if you can't feel it how will you enjoy it. We live to die. Anyway I got an A on a paper today. it was worth 50% of my grade. I'm happy...I guess. My head hurts it all moves so slow. my life moves slowly. time moves slowly. I could go nutz here. 3 more years LOL. Nah its ok I just need someone. someone special to me in the way I need them to be...I don't make much sence. I always feel alone here. Or like my existance doesn't mean shit.